Comments on: Church Shopping

By: Clever Dude

Clever Dude — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 14:11:21 +0000

@John, I did the “excursion” before I was married, which means I had the freedom to choose as I wished. Now that I’m married, the one problem I’m finding with searching out more “truths” is that my wife is pretty solid in her Catholicism and doesn’t understand why I need to buck the trend. I envy her faith, but we think differently and I need things explained to me to understand them better.

If you’re single, or if not but your spouse is open to exploration of your faith, then I recommend just visiting other churches (non-Catholic, but still Christian) on Sundays. If you feel guilty missing mass at your parish, then attend both services. It’s usually only an extra 1-2 hours out of your day, and if it’s something important to you, then you should be happy to get a “double dose” of spirituality on Sundays. You can also try doing a Saturday night mass at your church, or nearby Catholic church, and use Sundays for visiting other churches.

I do recommend exploring your own faith (Christianity) to see if you just need a jump start. If you still can’t find what you’re looking for, then it may be time to branch out to other lines of thought and see what you find. Good luck!

By: John

John — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 04:52:12 +0000

When you took your break from organized religion to go out on your own, how did it feel initially? I’m planning an extended holiday from my traditional Catholic practice. I find the thought of pursuing this a little daunting….probably because I still hear that voice saying”It’s a “mortal sin to miss mass on Sunday.” But I want to find out how “other” people live their lives and find God outside of the fairly neatly circumscribed program orchestrated by my tradition.. Was the Samaritan woman in the New Testament ever permitted to re-enter her clan as a respectable woman much less worship with the Jews of her day – of course not, but Jesus still embraced her. Perhaps it’s time for me to move from the safety of my 44-year old habit to one that might shake things up a little and offer the possibility for growth. I know that I can’t get a signed permission slip from the local deaconate to take a holiday from their program, but I’m still wondering if this experiment I’m planning is for the right reasons. I’m very excited about it – both mentally and physically. Perhaps it feels too good to be right??

By: ZJ

ZJ — Thu, 11 Dec 2008 09:13:45 +0000

You probably won’t be able to attend this church – it’s in Singapore… But you might enjoy what is preached from the pulpit. Here are free samples:

http://www.newcreation.org.sg/resources/audio/audiomessage.htm
http://www.newcreation.org.sg/resources/video/videomessage.htm
http://www.newcreation.org.sg/resources/dailydevotion/dailydevo.asp

By: tulips52

tulips52 — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 01:13:58 +0000

I really enjoyed reading your post and found a lot of similarities in our situations. I too was raised Irish Catholic. Although I never quit attending, as a teen I always thought that the Church of God had a nice ring to it. It seemed to say it all quite simply. While in college, I fell in love with a divorced man who was raised Southern Baptist, but who did not espouse their beliefs. My fiance had briefly attended a Lutheran Church after a co-worker had recommended it, but for some reason, he stopped going there. When we decided to get married, I started the annulment process so we could be married in the Catholic Church. Then, my parents passed away and for some reason, it didn’t seem so important to be married by a priest. We started shopping for a church home. Every Sunday we would head out for a different church. Episcopal, Methodist, Presbyterian- we tried them all. We were trying to find something meaningful to both of us. Our needs were almost exactly the same as those you listed. Well, as we left a Methodist Church one Sunday, depressed that the service had not touched us, we spotted the little Lutheran Church my fiance had once attended across the street. We decided to go there the next week. The following Sunday, as we stepped out of the car onto the parking lot, we knew. We had come home. It was an “Ah-ha” moment. We were warmly welcomed by people who remembered my fiance even though it had been years since he had been there. The service itself was uplifting and the Pastor kind and well, Godly. We stayed after the service and spoke to the Pastor about getting married. After the wedding, we brought my husband’s children there and they were Baptized. We wound up being co-teachers for a third grade Sunday School class one year. Fast forward 5 years. My husband and I always wanted to work together. I was home sick from work one day and read our Lutheran magazine and found an ad for a couple to manage a Lutheran Retreat Center in another state. After a lot of procrastination and prayer, we decided to apply for the job. Fast forward twenty-one years! We have now worked at four different Lutheran camps in three states. The Lutheran Church (ELCA) continues to have meaning for us and allows us to grow spiritually. I highly recommend you look into it. It meets most of the needs you stated in your list. The main belief is Justification through Faith in Jesus. Most Lutheran Churches I have attended are open and inviting, but they are all different too: I wouldn’t say you won’t find one that could be off-putting. Please don’t let the word “Evangelical” turn you off immediately: we are not Fundamentalist. We are open to other beliefs and are in communion with several other denominations. As for non-repetitive, that’s where our needs differ. Lutherans are a Liturgical Church and do follow an Order of Service every week. The Roman Catholic in me loves the Liturgy and the repetition! It was one thing my husband had to adjust to in the beginning. However, in the Evangelical Lutheran Worship (ELW) used by most congregations, I think there are 10 different worship settings. Most congregations use at least two or three different ones every year. As for hymns, to me it seems we never sing the same one twice! As for sermons, well, Pastors are all individual. Like you, I prefer them to make their point and move on. However, I have had Pastors who seem to belabor the message during the sermon. The ELCA counterpart in Canada is the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Canada (ELCIC). I have met many ELCIC camp professionals during the years and found them to be open and spiritual.
Sorry this wound up to be such a long response, but your post about your search reminded me of where we were twenty six years ago. Good luck and God Bless!

By: threadbndr (karla)

threadbndr (karla) — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 17:56:54 +0000

Don’t give up on the main line protestants quite yet. What you are discribing sounds a lot like the more thoughtful sort of Anglicanism.

Wish you lived close by, would love to have your family as guests at my home parish.

By: Mormon girl

Mormon girl — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 02:36:45 +0000

Can I just say, I love that a mormon missionary helped you put up dry wall. Typical. Those guys are not afriad to get their hands dirty.

I also like the “thinking of naming your child Darwin” quote. I threw that idea out to my husband, religious truths and physical truths should compliment each other, not try to tear the other to pieces. As a bio major at Brigham Young University, it was really cool to realize that. But Darwin isn’t that cool of a name nowadays…perhaps I’ll name my dog Darwin.

Good luck on your quest.

By: Tina

Tina — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 22:54:46 +0000

I hope you understand that I was not judging you with my comment. Many people do treat church as some sort of social club, and if that works for them, who am I to judge? I was just trying to point out that there are different approaches based on different goals. It seems as though you have given it a lot of thought and the sincerity of your search is refreshing.

By: Lisa Badalamenti

Lisa Badalamenti — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 16:08:21 +0000

To answer your question, my goal is to find a church that will help me grow spiritually- otherwise, a social club of some sort would do. However, the “things I want to hear” and the beliefs I hold cannot be removed from this, as they serve as a reference point for what I believe to be the truths that Jesus taught.

By: CJ

CJ — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 15:04:36 +0000

I’ve pretty much given up on finding my ideal church. I’ve just decided to get up and go when I feel like it and take from the experience what I will. If I visit a church and I find their teaching in conflict with what I understand the Bible to teach I just don’t go back again.

If you’ve got your heart set on finding a church home (ie a church community to be apart of) then I would suggest getting out and going to different churches every Sunday until you find one you like. I also suggest a great deal of prayer and meditation. Remember different churches in different denominations can be very different. And involve your whole family in the decision.

Good luck.

By: chris

chris — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 14:24:01 +0000

Try Buddhism. It is very close to what “true” christianity is (aka, just the facts and goodness, without all the pagentry).

and as we learned from the simpsons (throwing this bone out to my buds here)…you can still be a buddhist and celebrate christian holidays…just don’t expect the pony that lisa wanted.